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Love Bytes for June: Is It Love * Cool Pic * Stress Busters
June 01, 2011

Love Bytes, Issue #037-- Is it Love? * Cool Pic * Stressed out?

June 1, 2011
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"Loving can cost a lot but not loving always costs more, and those who fear to love often find that want of love is an emptiness that robs the joy from life.
        ~ Merle Shan

Is it Love You're Feeling, or Just Infatuation?


This is an old classic column from the "queen of advice for the lovelorn", Ann Landers. It is one of her best essays, quietly timeless advice for a couple at any stage of relationship.

"Infatuation is instant desire - one set of glands calling to another. Love is friendship that has caught fire. It takes root and grows, one day at a time.

Infatuation is marked by a feeling of insecurity. You are excited and eager but not genuinely happy. There are nagging doubts, unanswered questions, little bits and pieces about your beloved that you would just as soon not examine too closely. It might spoil the dream.

Love is the quiet understanding and mature acceptance of imperfection. It is real. It gives you strength and grows beyond you - to bolster your beloved. You are warmed by his presence, even when he is away. Miles do not separate you. You have so many wonderful little films in your head that you keep replaying. But near or far, you know he is yours and you can wait.

Infatuation says, "We must get married right away. I can't risk losing him." Love says, "Be patient. Don't panic. Plan your future with confidence."

Infatuation has an element of sexual excitement. Whenever you are together you hope it will end in intimacy. Love is not based on sex. It is the maturation of friendship that makes sex so much sweeter. You must be friends before you can be lovers.

Infatuation lacks confidence. When he's away, you wonder if he is cheating. Sometimes you check.

Love means trust. You are calm, secure and unthreatened. He feels your trust, and it makes him even more trustworthy.

Infatuation might lead you to do things you will regret, but love never steers you in the wrong direction.

Love is elevating. It lifts you up. It makes you look up. It makes you think up. It makes you a better person than you were before."

Copyright © All rights reserved. Ann Landers

*** No one can take the place of Ann Landers, but.... we are very proud of our advice column! Offering some of the best down-home common-sense advice you have ever heard. Check it out:  Dear Stella


True Love is Forever...

Have you seen this photo?


In 2007, in Northern Italy, during excavation for a new factory building, ancient artifacts were uncovered, turning the site into an archaeological dig.

There, among flint tools, arrowheads and a knife, archaeologists unearthed two skeletons locked in a tender eternal embrace. The remains appear to have been from the Neolithic period, and are 5,000 to 6,000 years old. The site is outside Mantua, just 25 miles south of Verona, the romantic city where Shakespeare set the star-crossed tale of “Romeo and Juliet.”

The pair are believed to have been a man and a woman and are thought to have died young, as their teeth were found intact, said Elena Menotti, the archaeologist who led the dig. "Experts will now study the artifacts and the skeletons to determine the burial site’s age and how old the two were when they died", she said.

What a find! Although scientists feel it has "more of an emotional than a scientific value", it sure lights up your imagination, doesn't it?

Who were they? What sudden and tragic event caused them both to die young, and together? Was it another Romeo and Juliet double suicide? Scientists have already theorized that the man may have died first, and then the woman sacrificed to keep him company in his journey to the afterlife. Jeez!

DNA testing may determine whether the two were related, but will not fill in the rest of the story for us. Alas, we likely will never know the true story behind this most moving display of true love.


*Romance Tip: Stressed out over your love life (or lack thereof)? Check out this guide, chock full of unique and specific ways to tamp down those life-wasting devils... stress and anxiety:  Stress Busters.

We hope you have enjoyed this issue of Love Bytes Ezine. Each month, we will bring you another inspiring photo, quote or poem, plus fresh new articles on love, intimacy, dating and relationships.


Cause if you don't have love, nothing else matters...


~Stella and the girls from

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