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Love Bytes, Where The Boys Are & Pillow Talk
December 01, 2009

Love Bytes, Issue #019 -- Where To Find Good Men * Between The Sheets? What to talk about (and NOT)!

December 01, 2009
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From "Adam Bede":

What greater thing is there for two human souls,
than to feel that they are joined for life-
to strengthen each other in all labor,
to rest on each other in all sorrow,
to minister to each other in all pain,
to be one with each other in silent unspeakable memories.

               ~George Eliot

Ladies: Where To Find Good Men! (Guys, read this to find out where to hang out)


Lonely, girl? Been out in the dating scene for a while? Haven't found your soul mate yet?

Meeting the right person is a numbers game. You must meet as many single men as possible. Your soulmate is out there. You just have to cross paths with him. And I guarantee he won't just plop down on your doorstep while you're inside watching X-Files reruns.

So...get out there! Go get your appointment calendar right now. Mark three unbreakable dates per week. Either real live dates with a guy or just going out...either alone or with one girlfriend. (Never travel in herds).

Stick to these dates no matter what...then, go about your business. Do things you enjoy. Start conversations with people who also enjoy these activities. Have a good time! You're out and about. You might or might not meet datable men tonight...but you're going to enjoy the evening, anyway, right?

But where are the good men hiding? Read on... visit our  Tip on Flirting  for finding true love.


What NOT To Say In Bed...                     

There you are, all cozy and comfortable with your honey. You two are able to confess your kinkiest desires, your most secret fantasies. But there are some topics that are definitely off limits while you are in bed:

1. Never say "I love you"
-- Why not? Sex, like alcohol, leads to loose lips. Be careful what you say in the heat of passion, especially this double-barreled phrase. Plenty of time for that when you are upright (and sober).

2. Never name the penis "Oscar"
--Or anything else, for that matter. Might be cute during cuddly love play, but you'll have to live up to what you did later.

3. Never say "My Ex and I used to..." or I've done that before..."
No good can come of any sentence that starts with "my ex". Actually, any reference to past sexual relationships can be hard on your current lover's ego. Men especially need to heed this advice. He may think relating details of past exploits makes him seem experienced and worldly. Well, guess what? She really doesn't want to hear about it! And girls, spare him the details of your "afternoon delight" with the refrigerator repairman. Every guy likes to think of himself as your "first and best". Let the past lie silent, and good riddance.

4. "So I was at the doctor's the other day..."
Not that a serious conversation about your sexual health isn't a good thing; it is. It's important to come clean about your sexual history, but it shouldn't be done when you're naked and horizontal already. Have that chat about carnal responsibility before you hit the sack.



Pillow Talk! Things You SHOULD Say In Bed...


Shy in bed? Learn to loosen up! Talking about sex is a great way to discover your partner's secret fantasies, limits and desires. The more you both open up and share your intimate thoughts, the more satisfying and interesting things will become. And heed these simple pointers... talk about:

Consider the difference between "that feels so good," and "you make me feel so good." Subtle distinction, sure, but it makes a big difference in sentiment - you're referring to your lover as opposed to the sex itself... a great ego booster!

"I'm going to..."
Don't ask if it's alright. Simply stating what you're about to do creates a sense of urgency and certainty that feels sexy. As in, "I'm going to jump your bones"...

"Ooh, yes..."
Positive verbal feedback helps your partner know when to keep on keeping on, and silence tends to discourage whatever is happening. You gotta let 'em know!

"Next time, I'm gonna..."
Anticipation is the spice of life!

For more great advice on your love life, visit... The Sensuous Woman.


Hey, been stressed out lately? You might want to sign up for this excellent (and free) 7-part e-course to saner living. Although it is offered by a grief website, every bit of the advice offered will work for you, too. Check it out:  Stressed Out?

We hope you have enjoyed this issue of Love Bytes Ezine. Each month, we will bring you another inspiring photo, quote or poem, plus fresh new articles on love, intimacy, dating and relationships.


Cause if you don't have love, nothing else matters...


~Stella and the girls from

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