Forbidden to Wear a Bra!

by Tina

I am a just turned 31 year old, married, mother of an 11 year old girl. My husband insists that at nights, on weekends, and on vacations, including summer vacations from school, that I wear no bra. Bras are for work only. My husband told me in no uncertain terms that he absolutely forbids me to wear a bra during these times. He says this is natural, sexy, and that he likes the way my breasts bounce slightly without flopping or sagging.

Therein is the point. At 31 and by no means being flat chested, I am worried that my breasts will sag from the lack of support. Fortunately, I have never seen any evidence of this as I have remained firm. Also, my daughter has just started wearing a bra, which she fought me on because her father won't let me wear one.

How do I handle this?


From Stella:
First of all, Tina, at the risk of causing trouble between you and your husband, it's your body! Why would you let him "forbid" you to wear a bra if you want to? Especially if you think it might be harmful?

Alright, now I will shut up and butt out on that issue, because I am a firm believer that whatever power arrangement works for a couple is their business, and no one elses.

Now, as far as whether or not wearing a bra will cause you to "sag" later, I would be interested in knowing the answer to that. Why? I haven't worn a bra in two years now! I hate them and feel it is the equivalent of a man having to wear a necktie. Stuffy and confining! I love the feeling of going bra-less, and luckily for me, my guy also thinks that is just fine!

Am I causing damage to my breasts? I don't know. (I'm sure if you ask a male physician, he will say you are). There is no doubt that as you age, your breasts will sag some and lose elasticity. But does wearing a bra slow down or lessen the demise? Does going braless hasten or worsen the process? Anybody know of an authority we can check with? Anyone out there know for sure? Post a comment for us.

Maybe if we can get you an accurate answer on this, you can make an informed decision and then reason it out with your husband.

Not sure what you meant about your daughter. What did you two fight about? Was she begging you to let her wear a bra or refusing to wear one?

Stay tuned,

Comments for Forbidden to Wear a Bra!

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Found some answers
by: Anonymous

I researched this and it looks like the bra does not prevent sagging... only hides it.

There is evidence that bras can actually be harmful:

(But I do wear one to go jogging...)

So the verdict seems to be:

If you feel comfortable not wearing a bra, go for it; you are not causing any harm. Bras do not prevent sagging later in life.

If you do not feel comfortable going braless, either because of large heavy breasts, or because you just feel self-conscious, then wear one.

A bra is simply an optional fashion item, not a health device.

This interesting website gives more support :) for going braless:

Power Exchange? D/S
by: Anonymous

If this woman has some kind of power exchange thing going with the hubby or is in some kind of D/s, bdsm, master/slave thing, then he may not be a jerk and may be perfectly within his rights inside of their relationship.

Otherwise, Tina may want to seek some kind of compromise. But it should be a compromise. He is her husband and if he wants the bra off once in a while, even in public, that's cool. But it should not be all the time. It's unfortunate their daughter has been drug into this. Either she wants to be like mom or is protesting her parents' behavior.

Do As Your Husband Says
by: Sissy Leighanne

I do what my wife tells me.

My Rules
by: Anonymous

My husband has almost identical rules to yours, except that I'm also forbidden to wear panties outside of work. At work I'm permitted a thong, but never full briefs.

Friends and family all know of my husband's rules about underwear and over time they have become accustomed to seeing me braless. But in the early days I got a lot of ribbing from my sisters and girlfriends about this.

My husband and I had an agreement when we first started dating that if anyone commented on my braless state that I had to tell them that I was forbidden to wear any underwear.

On other occasions, my (then boyfriend) would select a person (usually female) that I would have to tell of my rules regarding underwear, or reveal that I was shaved bald down below, which was long before it became popular. This was sometimes quite embarrassing, but I always did it nonetheless. That's what love does to you, I suppose.

These days everyone knows of my conditions, so that part of the game no longer exists. Going without underwear is still as much of a challenge today as it was 14 years ago when I started doing it. I love my husband and still enjoy his challenges.

hubbys rules
by: ledrann

As a mom of 3 & 43 years old my husband always said how sexy I looked w/o a bra. I'm a 34C cup and still only have a bit of sag after 3 kids. So after a couple years I started doing it more and more. Soon it became the norm and eventually my bras all disappeared. As far as the panty thing goes- if I'm wearing a skirt or dress I'm commando. If I'm wearing pants or shorts all I wear is a g-string. It took a while to find the comfortable ones but I eventually found some all cotton types that are so comfortable it's like heaven.

Braless and HAPPY
by: Kathy

I gave up wearing bras in 1976. I have not worn one since; in fact I don't even own one. My husband loved it then, and loves it now. I was a 36B. I guess I have sagged a little over the yrs., but I think that has to do with age as well.

My husband and me live in a very secluded house and we are nudists as well. In the summer we have friends over to go swimming and have a bar b-q after. We all go swimming nude, and the women that go nude are in their 30s and late 40s. They can't believe that I am 67yrs old and have not worn a bra in all these yrs. So... be braless and happy!

No Bra Fun
by: Sonja

I am a 34 year old mother of two and very grateful and proud to have a figure similar to Tina's.

I developed early and decided in my late teens to go braless - much to the objections of my parents at the time. Although Tina wears a bra at work, I began introducing my no bra look on Free Dress Friday's several years ago. I gradually expanded to where I no longer wear a bra to work at all.

Although there have been a few awkward moments where comments were made about my look in meetings with male clients, my bosses have been very supportive of me and feel that, overall, my style of dress is positive for their travel agency business.

My husband is just great and can't keep his hands off me after 7 years of marriage. I also like to wear short skirts to complement my look - and on certain naughty days or evenings out with my husband, I leave my panties in the drawer.

I hope that Tina is able to enjoy her braless lifestyle and not worry too much about sagging. The way I see it: By the time the breasts begin to sag - likely so will everything else. Why worry?

Love to all,

Sonja From California

No bra
by: Anonymous

I think it's great that you are willing to forego your bra for your husband. Whatver turns him/you on! Hey, my wife went from being braless to wearing a bra (after kids) and now I find myself looking at other braless women both irl and online.

Husband consent
by: Anonymous

During a family reunion my husband remarked how my sister's husband stared at my braless nipples in the morning when I was fixing and serving them breakfast; but he did not reproach me. On the contrary he seemed rather proud than jealous.

Forbidden to wear a bra too
by: Linda

My gosh I thought I was the only one lol. My husband gave me a similar ultimatum 2 years ago. He told me I could only wear a bra for church, work or functions at our kids school; and when I get home it must come off. We argued about it for a while and then he pointed out that he never asks anything of me except this.

I gave in and gave him all of my bras. It was the only way for me to break the habit of getting up and putting a bra on. This was 2 years ago and I would swear my breasts are firmer and higher than they used to be when I wore a bra everyday.

I am 43 and a mother of 2 and I was self conscious at first, but I got over it. I think it was easier to start with because I started going without on vacation. We went away and didn't take a bra with me. Now I don't even think about it. I don't think I would go back now by choice.

by: Netherlander

Dear Tina,

To work things out together in a relatioship is not allways easy and compromise is the magic word. Perhaps it's possible to find a bra that gives support and allows enough 'bounce'. I've seen them out there.

no bras owned here
by: Anonymous

I hate the confinement and uncomfortable feeling of a bra. I have large breasts 36 ddd, however, they are quite firm so I don't think bras help them stay firm, I think its all genetics. The only problem I run into at times is certain shirts do not hide my nipples as much as my husband would like. I have puffy nipples and if I wear petals on them, it makes them even more noticeable. It doesn't bother me, everyone has them, but my husband is bothered if anyone notices. It seems abnormal to bind your breasts. Let them breathe!

Never worn a Bra
by: Anonymous

When I first started to develop, my Mom wanted me to wear a bra and I tried, but it was so uncomfortable I couldn't wear it longer than an hour. Since then I have gotten married, had three children and nursed all three, and never owned or worn a bra. I am lucky because I am a 34b. I feel sorry for women with larger breasts that are stuck wearing bras daily. I am now 50 and still don't own or wear a bra. If your comfortable without one, don't wear it.

by: Melanie

I have a different problem. My HUSBAND insitst on wearing a bra to work. He has done so for the past five years and does it every day, as his manboobs are overdeveloped! Melanie

good article for u guys....
by: Sampath

whn im surfing the net i found this link and i got interested about ur i searched for some details on this n i found these interesting details for you....


Bras and breast cancer risk

Bra-wearing has been linked to breast cancer in a study done by Sidney Ross Singer and Soma Grismaijer. They found, for example, that women who wore a bra 24 hours a day had a 113-fold increase in breast cancer incidence compared to women who wore bra less than 12 hours daily! They suggest that bras exert enough pressure to the breast and surrounding areas to inhibit the flow of lymph, which then causes toxins and other waste material to remain in the breasts instead of being flushed out.

Now, this effect may be due to the fact that most women just wear the wrong size bra that is too tight somewhere. No one has done any studies investigating the link between breast cancer and how well the woman's bra fits. Either way, for your breast health's sake it is better to avoid wearing bras whenever possible, and for those occasions when you do need one, get well-fitting bras.

full story...

by: Anonymous

score 1-10 =wow 25

bras and breast cancer - a myth
by: Anonymous

Someone who would wear a bra 24 hours a day must have large, perhaps very large breasts. Breasts are made mostly of fat. The more fat, the more estrogen. The more estrogen, the more risk of all types of cancers. In my observation, very large breasted women are usually fat.

Check out this 2010 New York Times article on the myth of bras and breast cancer.

me too!
by: Jill

In my case, I was not so much "forbidden" to wear a bra (that seems like a threat to me), but I was asked and strongly encouraged by my partner to go without whenever I could. I complied and did it when it wasn't obvious with the top I was wearing, and eventually got used to the idea that it's become natural to the point that when I shop for tops and dresses, that I make an effort to purchase items that can be worn without a bra. I never had a problem going braless before, but I used to wear nipple covers when I did, now I don't even do that. I have to say that once you get used to the comfort and freedom of going without, it becomes uncomfortable to wear one. Should my partner and I no longer be an item, I highly doubt I'll go back to regular bra-wearing.

Great Look
by: Anonymous

If thats you you look great without a bra, very natural. Bra's are unnatural and aren't very flattering in most cases. If I were you I'd never wear a bra. Just a hint of nipples but those are natural also. Very attractive!

A Hot Wife
by: Anonymous

If that picture is any indication of what you're sporting under your blouse, then your husband is a wise wise man.

Don't own any
by: Cleo

In 1991 my husband shaved my pubic hair for the first time. The next day, my panties and the stubble from shaving became so irritating, I took them off before I ever got out the door. It was the first time I'd ever gone to work pantieless, let alone with hairless vulva. I was quite embarassed for awhile, but by day's end, I wasn't even aware I was sans panties or pubic hair.

Needless to say, he wanted to shave me often, and I agreed on one condition. I got to shave him as well. He was hesitant at first, as no man shaved his pubes in those days. Like me, after the first day of wearing briefs after being shaved, his underwear came off. He upped the ante by saying the only way this was going to continue was if we both gave up our underwear, because he now knew how much they irritated the shaved skin.

It took me awhile to go completely commando, though he gave his up immediately. I started by going pantieless and braless all weekend and as soon as I got home from work. Since I'm a 36D its pretty obvious with most blouses that I am braless. The first family function was at Thanksgiving, so I wore a sweater which hid my nipples but not my jiggle. My sisters and my dad gazed at my breasts long enough to communicate to me that they knew, though no one said anything to me. Within a few weeks, I had weaned myself from wearing panties altogether, though I still wore a bra on occassion with certain tops that revealed too much. A few months ago, a full-time braless co-worker introduced me to nipple covers,(didn' even know they existed)and I've been braless full-time ever since. My one and only bra went out in the trash in August, and I haven't owned panties in twenty years.

Forbidden? Are you serious?
by: Cat Girl

First and foremost (with a huge red flag and alarm bells going off), what kind of relationship do you have? It doesn't sound too healthy, that's for sure. It's as if your husband is using you for his own pleasure (and in public no less) without any regard whatsoever for your own views. He seems a tad controlling, no? That said, there is nothing wrong with being obviously braless in public--your breasts won't sag any more than they would otherwise. Wearing a bra has nothing to do with "prevention." In fact, some argue that going braless helps to deter sagging. Either way, does that even matter? I go braless by choice. Sure, my husband likes it, but it was my idea, not his. It's healthier in a lot of ways (some also contend that going braless lessens the risk of breast cancer), and it's infinitely more comfortable. Plus, it feels sexy as anything (my sex life has improved tremendously since I declared myself to be bra-free). But the main issue is that it's my choice. I'm sorry that you feel a marriage must mean that you must cater to your husband's every whim and that he would even have the gall to request this of you. Despite this, I would encourage your daughter to make her own decision and to encourage her if she wants to be bra-free.

looking great
by: Anonymous

Tina you look great. If it keeps your man hot for you go for it.

forbidden to wear a bra
by: margaret

going around without wearing bra is great. without wear a bra will not cause your breasts to sag. i wished they would stop making bras. the women got the right to vote one hundred years ago. i think that all women should have the right to decide if they want to wear a bra or not. i would love to go out without wearing a bra. when i am home i walk around my house without a bra on. it feels so wonderful not wearing a bra.sometimes i don't even wear a top either. i walk around the house completely topless exposing my big breasts which is totally natural. after all adam & eve walked around the garden of eden completely naked.

by: Anonymous

A bra does NOT help the normal nature of droop!!

Conflicting Interests.
by: Martina

I am 47 and a mother of 4 children. I breast fed each of them for more than 12 months which has left me very small, less than 32a. My husband prefers me wearing padded bras always, even in bed and this has become normal after more than 10 years now.
About three years ago friend 'requested' that I not wear bras in his company. I had not been anywhere without a bra in 30+ years but I did it. Now people look at me more which is nice and its improved my self confidence. These days I only wear bras when my husband is around and to work - where we have thin white uniform blouses. My dark nipples show although black bras are ok? I'm very pleased to hear this will not cause more sag.

Blame him
by: Anonymous

Teenagers have an extremely fine sense of hypocracy and double standards. They also in general simply hate being told what to do.

The easiest thing to do is put the burdon on your husband. He's the one who likes to see your breasts jiggle, he's the reason the same is going to happen to his daughter, so make it his problem.

I suppose you could tell her that your bralessness is a sign if submission or ownership or something, you know, the truth but will hopefully sound undesirable to a rebellious teenager.

I doubt it'll work though, but there you go.

by: Anonymous

Tina my husband does not like me to wear a bra at all he love to see my breast move and jiggle they are a size E also I have large nipples, he loves it, he does not ask for much so I give him this. Marriage is compromise.

Husband (Doctor) says underwear and bras are unhealthy
by: Gemma

Dear Stella. I’ve seen plenty of comments on this forum which look very questionable, but that said, allowing a husband dictate what you wear should not automatically be considered wrong. It depends on the attitude between you and the motives. I stopped wearing bras and underwear (except during my period) more than 10 years ago following the strongest of requests from my husband who believed both were unhealthy. He was (and still is) a Doctor, so I do trust him. It caused a great many arguments at the time, and I fought like crazy, not because I disagreed with my husband’s views, but because I did not like being told how to dress. With all the fights and arguments now just history, I think it was one of the best changes I could have made. Very feminine, and very healthy.

i am forbidden to wear a bra
by: Anonymous

I am a 42DD and my husband forbids me to wear a bra he took them away a few months back, i am getting slowly used to going without a bra but it is taking time getting used to it as i know my breasts are big and men look at them through my tops , my husband is my Master too so i obey him in everything .
I buy tops that are cross over for the summer they look very nice actually and although i am big breasted and getting used to go braless i love the feel and freedom .

Showing them off
by: Anonymous

My wife has got beautiful smaller breasts so she doesn't need a bra for support. However she's got very firm, pointy nipples so depending on the shirt or dress they're quite visible.
When we first got married I asked her not to wear a bra. She was surprised, but when I told her I liked it when other men looked at her breasts she enjoyed the "naughty" game and accepted.
We are now living in a small town and my wife has a job dealing with the public, so she wears a bra to work depending on the clothes she's wearing. But she hates wearing a bra so much that as soon as she's off work she's bra less

by: Anonymous

I enjoy reading about the women who go without a bra. I have attempted to get may wife to go without one for several years. She with then go a couple day at, home, without one then she forgets and never takes it off. By reading your comments I believe I will push it a little more and see if she will become a braless woman.

Doctor's orders
by: Anne Marie

What an interesting thread. I too was instructed not to wear a bra or panties except during my period from the day I was married nearly 20 years ago. My husband was a doctor and said poor ventilation around the vulva was unhealthy and a factor in many 'women's issues'. I think having a rule which is based on just preference is quite different to a rule based on medical opinion, no matter how unconventional, so I don't have a problem with it, and I have steered my daughter in the same path.
Anne Marie

by: Anonymous

i feel that women should either go bra less or strapless

Me too
by: Anonymous

I have an inflamed asaphegeous (sp), and was having trouble breathing especially during meals. So my Dr told me to try and not wear a bra during meals, or if out then loosen it. Once I did that, my breathing was better. So I started going without from time to time even when not eating. So after that my husband asked me to go without everyday at home. I did for a while, then went back to it. He then researched wearing bras and found that not only were they restrictive for breathing, but basically a waste of material. So he told me to not wear one any longer. I was nervous the first time I went out in public without, but it got easier over time. Now he forbids me to wear one at all. I wear a cami under my shirts to give extra fabric when I'm go out of the house. I'm a stay at home/home school mom. My kids know I don't wear one and they haven't said anything, they've heard dad and I talk about health reasons to not wear one. I do however still wear a sports bra when we visit my side of family once/mo, and our oldest boys that live on their own. One of these days I'll go without even around them. We are Christians and my husband is a deacon, I go without to church even. The trick is to wear a cami under shirt and wear shirt with print on it in the bust area. At home I don't wear a cami underneath, hubby loves coming home to my braless breasts. He knows I'm looking out for my health and obeying him. I'm a natural 42D

Doctor's advice
by: Helen G

This is all very interesting and the first time I've seen others decribe the same situation as me. I met my husband-to-be in medical school (more than 30 years ago) so we both knew plenty about 'female health'. It was his view that bras where (in general) not healthy, and that the vulva should not be enclosed unless it was unavoidable (just menstruation). After a good deal of argument/discussion/consideration, I decided he was correct. Getting rid of bras was no big deal as I was only 32B. Wearing a skirt without panties was much more of a challenge, but I stuck with it, and over time viewed the change as a real success story. A piece of clothing so many woman view as essential, can also be viewed as unhealthy but I guess this is just so non-PC that no doctor could ever make this view public.

Great Wife
by: Anonymous

I think it's great that you go braless for your husband. I wish my wife would. I've asked her a bunch of times and she always says no. It makes it harder because my friends wife never wears a bra and looks great. I don't think she has been told not to, but she would play along with anything if her husband asked. I think that's good and would keep the marriage exciting.

by: Cleo

I haven't worn a bra since 1991, and while it was scary at first, I can't imagine ever going back. I know some women can't, for various reasons, but I am (or was) a C cup, and my breasts are still in pretty good shape for a 55 year old woman.

I know everyone is different, but I really don't think it's going to hurt your breasts, and may actually help.

And I kind of liked being "forbidden" at first, and we've been married now for 25 years.


by: Anonymous

I,have never worn a bra, iam now 20 years old. I lived at home with my dad since my mum left when i was twelve. My dad would not allow me to buy bras, because he said they were garments made to attract boys by pushing them up and giving me a cleavage. He did not seem to worry that the boys could see my nipples through my white school blouse, because being braless made me look flat, and that was all that seemed to bother him. When i got to about 14 and started dating boys he would still not let me wear a bra, instead he took me out and bought me some plain cotton vests. Thinking back to that shopping trip, the strange thing about dad was the fact that he said that i was now old enough to wear thongs and g-strings, and since then have never worn anything else. The only time not wearing a bra was a problem to me was during P.E at school, when the male P.E teacher used to make me do hand stands against the wall and would pay particular attention to me when running etc.

Braless Visit
by: Anonymous

My friends wife hasn't worn a bra as long as I've known her. 15 years later her tits are perky and she is still going braless most of the time. It's a very sexy look without a bra, can't wait to visit again.

naked underneath
by: Frank

My wife hasn't worn a bra or panties in thirty plus years, at my request. She's very accessible to me at any time or place, and is free from any encumbrance. I'm a, sometimes noticeable, "Free-Baller, much to her delight. She's a very perky 32C+ with very little sag @ 75 years. I buy her clothing that accents the movement of her breasts just for my enjoyment, as well as her delight. She enjoys "innocently" showing off, and I fully encourage it.
She's a very attractive, free spirited, lady and enjoys the comments, encouragement and compliments that I give her appearance and wholesome attitude.

by: Kathy

I stopped wearing bras in 1976. I HATED them. I have gone everywhere ...BRALESS, Work ,church, school functions for my child,shopping etc. Did I get looks .oh yea. But I did not care. The only prob. is I have very large nipples and guys seem to stare at them when cold. I am 76 yrs old now still hate bras ,dont even own one. and NO I dont sag....I was a 36C ...dont know what I am now.....and dont care. My advice......THROW OUT YOUR BRAS

braless and loving it
by: Anonymous

I stopped wearing a bra years ago, I think I was in my 20s. I'm 66 now, and would never go back.

I love when men look at my boobs and lick their lips. If I sag so what?

My husband hated bras and would not let me waste money on them.

He loved that my nipples stood out. He was proud of them then as he is now, take them off ladies,See what you are missing.

There are so many things you can do with your nipples to keep them pointy, I love it.

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