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The Love Blog
Dear Stella, Have I Met the Perfect Woman?
I have met the most wonderful woman on a dating site. The first meeting I thought went badly, but she rang me when she got home and said she wanted to see me again. Its early days i know but i dont want to do anything stupid. I worry about my sexual performance and lack of experiance. Since seperation my life has become simplistic and un-cluttered. The perfect woman would make it complete. what do you suggest?
Woah! Sounds like you are a little infatuated with this "perfect woman". Take things slow and easy, casual and unpressured. This relationship sounds promising and it sounds as if you like her a lot. So give it plenty of time to unfold the way it was meant to be. Neediness is poison to successful dating, and she would pick right up on it!
I don't know how long you have been dating, but you refer right away to sex. Most men think that women feel just like they do about sex... (the sooner and more often, the better). That's just not the way most women feel about it. Most, honestly, would find it refreshing and a relief to date a man who is not immediately trying to steer her into the bedroom. Having sex too early in a relationship can ruin it!
Please read this page from our website about women and intimacy: The Sensuous Woman. That, honestly, is how most women really feel about it, and my advice from that page stands for you, too. Wait on the sex until the relationship is more mature and secure. The intimacy will then unfold naturally when the time is right, and you should have much less "performance anxiety" about it.
That's my advice to you, Steve. And by the way, no woman is "perfect". So lose that notion before you go any further. Good luck to you!