TIP ON FLIRTING
WHERE TO FIND LOVE &
FLIRT TIPS
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Tip on flirting ... |
"Men are like parking spaces...all the
good ones are taken, and the rest are handicapped".
Heard that one before? Or "There's just no
good men around here". You know what we say to that ? Bull !
Quality men are everywhere. Yes, some are married---but many are single or divorced,
too. This section is useful for you guys, too. Many of these ideas are just as
likely to produce an abundance of good women, too. How to find them? As you go about your everyday business, do it this way:
- Be clean, well-groomed, and wear a
great scent
- Girls, if it isn't feminine or sexy--- don't
wear it
- Guys, if it isn't stylish and flattering--- don't
wear it
- Approach any situation with a friendly,
open-hearted attitude (this might take some
practice)
- The dates will come... and you will
eventually find true
love
You are just as likely to meet your soulmate
while taking your dog to the vet as at an upscale club on a Saturday night. (More
likely, actually... less competition).
So, girls, instead of going to Tire World in
cutoff jeans, with greasy hair and a scowl on your face... try going in a cute sundress
with some good-smelling stuff, a touch of makeup, and a friendly smile...
Not only will you attract the married guy
in the office, but he'll tell his single buddies wrenching in the back (they have
a network of signals for a "chick alert"---so do grocery store guys, car salesmen,
auto parts clerks...)
Your goal: to be the subject of a "chick
alert". Why? You become a highly desirable woman to them. To get a date with you
would bestow great status to the lucky guy.
And Men, you gotta know. Women generally do not
have a guy-alert-network. But if you show up looking polished and buff, in some
flattering threads, you will turn a few female heads. Trust me...
TIP ON FLIRTING
GET READY---THE PROPER MINDSET
Tip on flirting...
Have you recently been through a serious breakup
or divorce? Don't fall victim to the "rebound effect"! Don't starting dating
again until you are ready. Read this great article to help you decide if the
time is right:
Ready to Date Again?
And if you are divorced, think long and hard before "tying the knot" again!
Read why Paul McCartney's second marriage was doomed from the start:
The
McCartney Love Tragedy.
Alright, so you think you're ready to
start dating? Well, don't even
consider jumping back into the dating
game until you do a little soul searching and go to work on your attitude...
Have you ever gone to a party and seen the
most unlikely couple there? The girl is overweight, her clothes don't fit
right, her face isn't that pretty... and yet she's got the most gorgeous guy! And
he's paying attention to her. And she smiles a lot.
Ain't fair, is it? You've got on a slinky
designer dress, hair's perfect, chic and classy, right? And what's wrong with this
picture?
No guy!
Why? Attitude... aura... warmth... love.
You might be scaring away potential dates from the get-go by carrying around some negative attitudes...
toward dating, love, men (or women), and life.
So you haven't had the best of luck in romance
thus far. No matter what has happened to you... lose the bad. If you want to emerge
a winner in the game of love... let the past go.
Make a pact with yourself. You're going to
let go of anger, frustration, fear, sarcasm, gloom, bitterness. If you have a "man-bashing"
(or men, a "women-hating") mentality, you'll never find your soulmate. Guaranteed.
I guess this is all easy for us to say, isn't
it? But this is one thing we all agree on... how essential it is to somehow bring
about a positive attitude adjustment on yourself. (We also agree that meditation
is a great way to do this--see Step 3 on coping skills).
You've got to get rid of those negatives!
Smell the roses, count your blessings and dig in for the long haul...
"Never think
that God's delays are God's denials.
Hold on; hold fast; hold
out. Patience is genius"
- Comte de Buffon, French naturalist (1707-1788)
TIP ON FLIRTING
WHERE TO FIND GOOD MEN (&
WOMEN)
Tip on flirting...
Meeting the right person is a numbers game.
You must meet as many singles as possible. Your soulmate is out there. You just
have to cross paths with him. And I guarantee he won't just plop down on your doorstep
while you're inside watching X-Files reruns.
So... get out there! Go get your appointment
calendar. Mark three unbreakable dates per week. Either real dates with a
guy or just out... either alone or with one girlfriend. (Never travel in herds).
Stick to these dates no matter what... then,
go about your business. Do things you enjoy. Start conversations with people who
also enjoy these activities. Have a good time! You're out and about. You might or
might not meet datable singles tonight...but you're going to enjoy the evening, anyway.
Where to find love? Read on.
Tip on flirting...
Below we have listed lots of super ideas
for improving your social life. Print these lists out. Make it a point to try different
ones, keep rotating. Your soulmate may well be hiding in one of those sailing classes, gallery openings,
or karaoke nights...
There are three main ways to meet other
singles:
- At work
- Through friends & acquaintances
- Extracurricular activities
WORK
Tip on flirting...
They say to "never mix business and pleasure" (never date people from work).
Yet, realistically, work is where you spend half your
waking hours. Common sense tells you to never date your boss, or
someone you supervise. But other than that, look around...let it be
known you're available. Lots of successful romances begin at work.
Be sociable, attend work-related functions and seminars. Go to
Happy Hour sometimes with your co-workers. Your cat won't starve.
NETWORKING
Tip on flirting...
Let your network of family, friends and acquaintances
know you are
available...and would like to meet new eligibles.
This is probably the most effective and fruitful source of
acceptable dating material. But you have to keep reminding them!
EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITIES
(CLASSES, CLUBS, EVENTS, FUN PLACES TO GO)
Tip on flirting...
This is a great way for you to
take action--to expand and enrich your social life...and thus expose yourself to
more potential dating partners.
Think! Make a list of your interests, hobbies... things
you always
wanted to do but never got around to. Take lessons, join a club.
Watch the newspaper for local events coming up. Just make sure
it's something men would participate in, too. You won't find Mr. Right
at a quilting bee...
TIP ON FLIRTING
OUR SUPER LIST OF PLACES TO MEET SINGLES
- CLUBS
& GROUPS
- CLASSES
- EVENTS
- OTHER FUN PLACES
CLUBS, SUPPORT GROUPS
& SPECIAL INTEREST GROUPS
(Check the local pages of your newspaper for listings)
Homeowners group/Crimewatch
Writer's group/Book club
Classic car club
Coed softball or volleyball team
Ski club
Hiking, jogging or biking club (or find a popular path to
do your exercise)
Political groups
Parents without Partners
Sierra Club
Bridge or Chess Club
Volunteer activities-hospitals, public schools, local
charities
Outdoor sports--backpacking, camping, boating, sailing,
skiing,
kayaking and scuba diving (lots of men!)
CLASSES-
At the jr. college, vocational school, adult continuing education
Art classes- watercolors, ceramics, sculpture, photography
Computer/ internet classes
Landscaping/horticulture
Bridge
Meditation or yoga instruction
Aerobics
Golf or tennis lessons
Dance- swing, salsa, ballroom or line dancing
Tae Kwon Do or Judo
CPR certification
Investment seminar
Woodworking or handyman courses
Sailing or scuba diving lessons
Cooking
Learn to play a musical instrument
Acting/theatrical class
Learn a foreign language
Horseback riding lessons
Are you a daredevil? Take up skydiving!
EVENTS-
Grab a friend and go
Food festivals
Craft fairs
Wine tasting
Personal-growth seminar
Music concerts & Outdoor jazz festivals
Sporting events-local high school games, golf or tennis
tournaments, Pro sports games
Rodeo
Art exhibit or gallery opening
Singles dances
Parties- (never turn down an invitation)
Give a party or barbecue yourself
Give dinner parties weekly-ask your friends to invite
single men
Flea markets
High school or college reunions
Monday night football at the pub
Super bowl party
Classic car show
Auction
Play at the community theatre
OTHER GREAT PLACES TO
MEET THEM:
Church-singles events
Coffeehouse/internet cafe
Sidewalk cafe
Bookstore/library--magazine section
Health club/ coed gym
Gourmet shop/health food store
Supermarket...yes
Sushi bar
The Park-offer to walk your neighbor's dog
Internet dating (See our section on Love on the 'Net)
Offline dating service (yellow pages)
Pool or hot tub in a nice apartment complex (If you
don't live in one, make friends with someone who does)
Three day cruise to the Caribbean
Browse Lowe's, Home Depot or local hardware store
Bowling alley
Zoo or city aquarium
And last, but not least--Nightclub. Find
a nice, friendly jazz or
piano bar--take a girlfriend and go on Karaoke night! This is great
fun, on occasion. Just be careful, and don't drink too much, either.
As Ann Landers once said, "If you're looking for trout, don't go
fishing in a herring barrel".
TIP ON FLIRTING
LEARN THE GENTLE ART OF FLIRTING
Tip on flirting...
Flirting... does the word have negative
connotations for you?
Then realign your attitude---flirting is nothing more than genuine,
open friendliness...
Sincere flirting cannot be faked. So you need to rediscover your
playful side...give yourself permission to connect with others.
GET READY
Before you get "out there", have a little talk with yourself. You want
to appear calm, emotionally open and approachable. And relax! Quit
taking all this so seriously. Keep your perspective and your sense of
humor. Be willing to laugh at yourself. If you are always smiling and
having a good time, others will approach you. Persistence with patience.... and
they will come.
GET A FLIRTING PROP
Tip on flirting...
Figure
out a way to make yourself stand out. Carry or wear a conversation piece: a pet,
printed button or t-shirt, a funky hat or shoes, an interesting book or
magazine. There must be something that's just the right "conversation starter"
for you.
READY? LET'S GO!
Tip on flirting...
Okay, now you're out there. Someone strikes
your fancy. How do you
initiate an encounter? Scientific research has shown that a smile and
brief but direct eye contact (look at his pupils) is the most effective
way to get them moving.
Maintain open body language---heart to heart, face to face.
Face him with an open chest area, arms and legs uncrossed.
Arms folded across your chest say "Nope, not this girl!"
Didn't work? Too good to let go? Then strike
up a conversation
yourself. Now, this is not easy to do. But force yourself at first, and
you'll get better at it, more comfortable. Just remember, you may
be doing him a favor... most people are shy about "going first".
And you don't have to be a brilliant conversationalist,
either. Just be
friendly, and start small talk or introduce yourself... the new,
confident, relaxed you. Go for it! What do you have to lose?
For a quick roundup of some scientific research done to determine what it is
that attracts a lover, read
The Science of
Love.
"And in the end...
The love you take
Is equal to the love...
You make."
The
Beatles knew...
Got a date? Super!
On to
Step 6 for some
great dating tips
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