"Confidence is the sexiest thing a woman can have.
                         It's much sexier than any body part"---

                   -Aimee Mullins, Oprah Magazine, May, 2004

Women and intimacy...

This is a most interesting and helpful section for you to explore. Included is plenty of down-home philosophy and great ideas to help you become a most sensual woman... while maintaining yourself worth...

  • Haven't slept with him yet?
  • My Mama always told me
  • Another one of Mama's secrets revealed
  • Ideas!
  • Sexual compatibility test
  • Expand your horizons... study up!
  • Handful of helpful books
  • About massage and sex
  • Enter the Slightly Naughty Playroom

             SEX, WOMEN AND INTIMACY small love heart with arrow piercing it
              WHAT? YOU HAVEN'T
                 SLEPT WITH HIM YET?!!! 

Well, good! (We mean that... now hear us out...)

Women and intimacy...

You need to let lots of time pass before you become intimate with any man...  like months, even. Really. You have nothing to lose...  and everything to gain!

How many times have you started dating a man... and then got interested. And you started thinking (just like a girl)... Hmmm, I like this guy... maybe this'll work out... I don't want to lose him... now how can I keep this going? Hmmm... I know... I'll sleep with him... that oughta get him hooked!

So you do... and you know the rest of the story... things quickly start to go haywire... and you lose him anyway... and then you wonder... once again...... what went wrong?

You can easily ruin a perfectly good relationship by hopping into bed prematurely. It can be tempting, we know... the closeness and physical warmth that comes with sex can be comforting, and even fool you into thinking you have true intimacy and a future with the guy. Don't confuse sex with love! Or you're sure to get your heart broken. Again.

Instead of making this same mistake, over and over again, vow to yourself that this time... you will WAIT.  You'll wait 'til you know, trust and love him. THEN the sex will be meaningful and beautiful, and happen for all the right reasons. It'll be less likely to sabotage a potential soul match.

This bit of advice has nothing to do with morality (although we admire that reason for abstention, too). It has everything to do with reality...

Women and intimacy...  couple being intimate in bed

There's no denying that sex complicates a relationship. No matter how smart, modern and sophisticated you may be... sex is mysterious and complicated. It opens up little pockets of weirdness in the brain... old hurts and resentments...  now doesn't it?

Sex bares not only your body, but your soul  to another human being, leaving you utterly helpless and vulnerable. THAT'S why we advocate saving sex for when you truly know and can trust your partner with this most tender part of you.

When you're with the right man, sexual love is private, secret and special. It is a sacred and healing energy shared by the two of you; and it helps to forge a solid and passionate friendship.

"Women need a reason to have sex.
                       Men just need a place"---Billy Crystal  

              SEX, WOMEN AND INTIMACY small love heart with arrow piercing it
             MY MAMA ALWAYS TOLD ME...

Sex, women and intimacy...

Now, then, if, on the other hand, you are a mature woman, lucky enough to find yourself in a committed, caring relationship... then all bets are off... our advice to you changes... like 180°!

Give it to him... and give it to him often !

Alright, alright... That sounds a little old-fashioned and sexist, doesn't it? And one-sided? We're sure there are a few men out there who need this pep talk. But, the  evidence goes overwhelmingly the other way. Surveys, research and marriage counselors all agree... the #1 complaint men have when it comes to marriage is this: Women tend to lose interest in sex, and men don't. See a problem there? And there's such an easy fix to it...

Do you truly want a happy long-term relationship? One of the best ways you can strengthen the bond you have with your mate is to make time for love and play (read: sex).There is hands down nothing more important or reinforcing to a relationship than an active and inspired sex life. So...


                                sexy woman in pink tshirt holding romantic pink rose

Women and intimacy...

Now, here's what Mama used to say...
and she spoke the truth...

                                       big mansion home
Does it really matter if you have the most beautiful house, cleanest kids, most perfectly balanced meals and a floor you can eat off of... if you find out your man got bored and strayed?

Why, your "perfect life" will come crashing down around you! Why did this happen? Because, you were too busy pruning the roses, chasing the children with a washcloth, attending gourmet cooking classes, and sweating at the gym... too busy and tired to attend to your intimate life...

Don't let sex slide into the background of your lives--- keep it center stage, where it belongs. Put forth some time, effort and imagination... do a little research... there's plenty of resources out there to help you liven things up in the bedroom.

And what do you think he'd do if he found out you were "studying up" on such things? Why, he'd be pleasantly surprised, that's what! He'd rather have you planning a new adventure for tonight than pruning the roses... trust us on this one.

                                               mad girl in ponytail pruning the roses
Women and intimacy...

It's all very simple, really... about sex...

He loves it. He needs it. It's IMPORTANT to him.

You love him. You need him. Make it IMPORTANT to you.

If you don't keep your guy intrigued, and well-loved... he'll get it somewhere else. Sound old-fashioned? It is, but it still rings true today...

Mama knew! She had six kids but still found time at the end of a harrowing day of domesticity to stop, clean herself up, put on a little makeup and perfume, and greet her life-partner pleasantly.
It all came back to her... ten-fold.


***Want to know what men secretly look for in a woman?
Read this excellent expose': What Men Want. Then c'mon back for more great tips on becoming a sensuous woman!


             SEX, WOMEN AND INTIMACY small love heart with arrow piercing it

Sex, women and intimacy...

       "It's just human. We all have the jungle inside of
        us. We all have wants and needs and desires,
        strange as
they may seem. If you stop and think
        about it, we're all pretty creative, cooking up all
        these fantasies. It's like a kind of poetry"---

                         Diane Frolov & Andrew Schneider
                                     Northern Exposure, 1994
        colorful wild gibbon in the jungle of love

Every man has deep inside him a "secret sexual desire". All of them. If you can figure out what your man's is... and give it to him... well, then, you have found the ultimate key to happiness... his and yours.

               lucky girl holding the key to happiness over her head

Every man has a secret longing, fetish or fantasy he would love to act on. Hopefully, it's harmless, something simple like tying your hands, or wearing tight, silky panties (not you, him), or doing it in a rocking chair with his socks on.

Yeah, he's got a hidden fantasy. What is it? Try asking him... he may be only too eager to tell you. If it isn't totally repulsive, and doesn't degrade you or hurt... then why not? No one else ever has to know about the secret games you play together! (We do NOT think you should ever feel obligated to do anything dangerous, painful, illegal, or just too weird for you).

Women and intimacy...

Give him his secret sexual wish... and give it to him often...
and he'll give you the world on a platter...
                                                             gloved hand holding world on platter
And if you fail to give it to him, he'll either find another (willing) partner, or he'll always feel like he's missed out on something...

                                  ...he has.

P. S. Nine times out of ten, this is his secret sexual wish.

P.P. S.S: Have suspicions that your guy might be cheating on you (gulp!) ? Get at the truth with our concise and useful guide, Sign of a Cheating Mate.

   SEX, WOMEN AND INTIMACY...IDEAS! small love heart with arrow piercing it

Sex, women and intimacy...

So, how do you go about invigorating your sex life? Start by learning what turns men on... learn what hot, raw sex lives in the hearts of men:

  • Go to a "progressive" video store, in the "back room". Tell the salesman you need a "porno flick" to surprise your guy tonight, and ask him for the best one. Go home and watch it. Instant insight!
  • Too chicken to go to the video store? Then go to a newsstand and pick up the latest copy of Penthouse or Hustler magazine. Turn to the "Forum" or "letters" section for a real education on what men want...

Now, just in case there's a guy checking this section out... Want to know how women long to be treated? Watch some romantic soft porn for pointers---

Check out movies by directors Candida Royalle, Gloria Leonard or Deborah Shames.     
                                                  projector and film in silhouette

Sex, women and intimacy...

pink kitty pajamas... not very sexy lingerieAnother quick tip for ramping up your intimate life...

What do you wear to bed, girl? Be honest, now. What is it, T-shirts and his old boxers? The Pink Kitty flannel pjs your Mom gave you for Christmas? What are you thinking !?!
He might not ask for it, and he might not complain about your current bedroom attire, but we promise you this... he would LOVE it if you got some spicy new lingerie, and wore it on occasion! pink brain with lightning coming out of itMen just love this, it gets into the "Sexual Fantasy" centers of their brains. 

So, get thee to the mall... Victoria's Secret is great, walk through and notice all the wistful men hanging around...




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Sex, women and intimacy...


Here's some excellent information to help you guys out... in bed:

   SEX, WOMEN AND INTIMACY...small love heart with arrow piercing it

Want to know what's really going on inside that guy's head?

Want to know what his secret sexual fantasies are?
Want to know if he has ever cheated on a mate?
Want to know how often he considers the minimum limit for
    sexual happiness?
Want to know how he feels about marital aids, explicit magazines
    and movies and your pink kitty flannel pjs?


Well, we have a painless and fun way to find out!
Give your guy the sexual compatibility test in our great new
couple's handbook "Dig A Little Deeper". It is a 26 page
relationship compatibility test. The whole thing is super
for opening up communication (and providing a little comic relief)
in your relationship.

There are also three bonus packs included: sexual compatibility
test, "Is this true love?", and "Telltale signs of a cheating mate".
(Hope you never need this... maybe your best friend will one day...)

You gotta try this out: (click on the book for more info)



        SEX, WOMEN AND INTIMACY small love heart with arrow piercing it
                  ... MASSAGE 

Sex, women and intimacy ...
Ahhh... massage...not only one of life's ultimate pleasures...but a natural prelude to sex. We find that massage promotes pleasure, caring, and intimacy. You owe it to your relationship to learn how...both of you! Visit our MASSAGE PARLOR to get started...

And DO NOT miss the selection of great massage and sensuality kits at the end of the page. Celebrate and nurture your intimate life with one of these daring ensembles!

                       woman holding bottle of massage oil out to her lover

          SEX, WOMEN AND INTIMACY  small love heart with arrow piercing it


                                                sexy girl with cowboy hat on her lovers back with lasso

Sex, women and intimacy...

Take a quick break now and read  25 Reasons Why it's Better to be a Woman...

We feel so strongly that humor is crucial to the success of your love relationship that we devoted a whole section to fun and play... And yes, some of it does lean you guys towards sex... not a bad thing, right? Come play with us...


              SEX, WOMEN AND INTIMACY small love heart with arrow piercing it

Sex, women and intimacy...
There's lots of resources out there to help you along...
Books, CDs, games and kits... read on...

Beautiful, romantic music can provide the perfect backdrop for your intimate life together. For some great suggestions, check out our section on SOUNDS...

                                    colorful picture of a cd

Here's a nifty little CD for you:

cd enhancing intimacy by stephen halpern Enhancing Intimacy (Stephen Halpern)

Appeal to his subconscious... Lush, lovely music with subliminal suggestions to enhance sensuality and caring. Try it! I swear I saw a difference when I put this on... A very popular CD.

Women and intimacy...

Be an informed consumer! We recommend the following books and "kits"... check 'em out!

book the new joy of sex   

"New Joy of Sex: A Gourmet Guide to Lovemaking"
             -by Alex Comfort

This "classic" guide, first written in the 1970's, is a must-have for your private library. It's a beautifully written and photographed, exquisitely illustrated "Cookbook" for the bedroom. Expand your sexual awareness and approach your intimate encounters in a spirit of JOY with this informative manual.

book tantric love for transforming into soul mates    

"Tantric Love: A Nine Step Guide
to Transforming Lovers Into Soul Mates", 
   -by Ma Ananda Sarita & Swami Anand Geho

Alright, now this one follows some of the tenets of Eastern philosophy. This book unlocks the secret powers of meditation, breathing, massage and physical intimacy to help you revitalize your love life.   Each chapter focuses on one of the Chakras- or energy centers- of  the body, and offers simple exercises to help you share the energy with your partner, and open the door to ecstasy. Dissolve the usual barriers to deeper intimacy... and become loving soul mates! Deep and mystical... try it, you'll like it.

book 101 nights of grrreat sex"101 Nights of Grrreat Sex", by Laura Corn

"Secret sealed seductions for fun-loving couples". This is great fun and guaranteed to heat up your sex life, twice weekly for a whole year! Once a week, you and your guy each tear out a sealed page. One for his eyes only, one for yours. You follow the secret instructions, and plan for your intimate seduction. You'll learn romantic new ways to turn each other on. Talk about anticipation ! Are you game? Is he? We bet so... (*Tip: Do not buy this book used; the sealed pages will be torn out)

Sex, women and intimacy...
Cultivate the perfect combination of physical technique, sensual attitude and soulful kindness... and you'll have the ultimate trump card... in the game of love.

                                                   card hand holding ace of spades and hearts

Sex, women and intimacy...

Whew! We covered a lot of ground in this section, don't you think? But it's all basic and important stuff to help you grow a quality intimate life. Do you know someone who could benefit from all this common-sense advice? A sister or close friend? Or would you like to spice up your own website or blog? We would be happy to share our website! We made it easy for you... click here to  pay it forward (and claim your free gift).



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